बिना लड़की की मर्जी के किये गये विवाह का क्या दुष्परिणाम हो सकता है इस बात का अंदाजा मेरठ में हुए एक विवाह और उसके बाद उत्पन्न हुई स्थिति को देख कर लगाया जा सकता है. घटना कुछ इस प्रकार है कि नेहा नाम की एक लड़की जिसकी शादी उसके पिता ने उसकी मर्जी के विरुद्ध नितीश नाम के युवक के साथ तय की थी.
शादी के दिन घर छोड़ कर उस लड़के के साथ चली गई, जिसे वह पसंद करती थी. फिर अपनी इज्जत बचाने की खातिर नेहा के पिता ने अपनी छोटी बेटी आरती की शादी नीतिश के साथ कर दी. ससुराल आकर आरती ने यह बताया कि वह विनीत नाम के लड़के से प्यार करती है और उससे मंदिर में शादी कर चुकी है. इस बात को जानने के बाद नितीश ने आरती को विनीत को सौप देने का फैसला किया और पुलिस अधिकारियों से मिलने के बाद उसे अपनी बहन बना लिया और आरती ने भी उसे राखी बाँध कर अपना भाई मान लिया. पर बाद में इसी मामले में आरती और उसके परिजनो ने नितीश और उसके परिवार वालो पर दहेज उत्पीड़न का आरोप लगाते हुए मुकद्दमा दर्ज करने की मांग की.
उनका आरोप था कि शादी में उन्होंने 12 लाख रूपये खर्च किये थे लेकिन शादी के बाद नितीश और उसके परिवारवालों ने एक सेंट्रो कार की मांग की और मांग पूरी नहीं करने पर आरती को प्रताड़ित किया गया. पूरे प्रकरण में आरती का कहना है कि नीतिश ही उसका पति है और पहले जो कुछ भी उसने कहा था वह दबाव में आकर कहा था. वही नितीश का कहना है कि उसके पास इस बात के पर्याप्त सबूत हैं कि आरती जो कुछ भी कह रही है वह झूठ है. और आरती के पिता द्वारा ऐसा सिर्फ इसलिए किया जा रहा है कि वह उनके परजिनों को दहेज उत्पीड़न कानून में फंसा कर उनसे पैसे वसूल कर सके.
अब इस मामले की जांच चल रही है कि कौन सच बोल रहा है और कौन झूठ. पर इतना अवश्य है कि अगर आरती और उसके परिजन झूठ बोल रहे हैं तो उन्हें इसकी सख्त सजा मिलनी चाहिए. इस तरह के मामलो की वजह से ही महिलाओं पर हो रहे आत्याचार को देखते हुए उनके के हितों की रक्षा के लिए बनाये गये दहेज उत्पीडन और घरेलू हिंसा अधिनियम जैसे कानूनों पर न सिर्फ सवाल उठने लगे है, बल्कि इसके दुरूपयोग की शिकायतें भी आम हो गई हैं. शायद यही वजह है कि आज कई सारे पुरुष संगठन भी इस बात के लिए एक जुट हो रहे है कि इन कानूनों की आड़ लेकर पत्नियों द्वारा किये जाने वाले उत्पीड़न से उनकी रक्षा की जाए. उनका यही कहना है कि इन कानूनों का सहारा तभी लिया जाता है जब विवाह के निभने की सम्भावना बहुत ही कम बची रहती है. विवाह टूटने का कारण चाहे जो भी हो पर अक्सर उसमे आरोप दहेज प्रताड़ना के ही लगते हैं. जो सरासर गलत और पुरुषों के साथ अन्याय है.
वैसे अगर देखा जाए तो आज भी आमतौर से हमारे समाज में लड़के और लड़की का विवाह उसके माता पिता के द्वारा ही किया जाता है. और विवाह तय करते समय लड़के-लड़की की पसंद नापसंद या उनकी इच्छा पर कम ही ध्यान दिया जाता है खासकर लड़की की इच्छा पर तो बहुत ही कम. विवाह सम्बन्ध जोड़ते समय जहां लड़की के पिता द्वारा लड़के के परिवार और उसकी आर्थिक स्थिति को ही केंद्रबिंदु में रखा जाता है, वहीं लड़के के पिता का सारा जोर इसी बात पर रहता है कि लड़की के पिता द्वारा विवाह में कितना खर्च किया जाएगा. पर समस्या तब उत्पन्न होती है जब लड़के या लड़की के सहमत न होने के बावजूद भी जबरन उनका विवाह उनकी मर्जी के विरुद्ध कर दिया जाता है.
ऐसे ममलों में माता-पिता का यही मानना होता है कि आज चाहे भले ही उनके बच्चे उनके द्वारा तय किये गये विवाह सम्बन्ध से सहमत न हों पर एक बार विवाह बंधन में बंधने के बाद न सिर्फ इस विवाह को स्वीकार कर लेंगे बल्कि एक खुशहाल वैवाहिक जीवन भी व्यतीत करेंगे. वे इस बात को मानने को तैयार ही नहीं होते कि लड़के लड़की की इच्छा के विरुद्ध जाकर किये गये विवाह का अंजाम क्या होगा. और फिर जब विवाह के टूटने की नौबत आती है तो अक्सर लड़की के पिता द्वारा दहेज की मांग को ले प्रताड़ित करने की शिकायत की जाती है, जिसके फलस्वरूप न सिर्फ लड़का बल्कि उसका पूरा पारिवार कानून के चपेटे में आ जाता है.
इस बात में भी कोई संदेह नहीं है कि दहेज उत्पीडन कानून के दुरूपयोग के जो आरोप लगाये जाते है वह पूरी तरह से गलत हों. पर इसका यह भी अर्थ नहीं है कि दहेज प्रताडना सम्बन्धी सभी शिकायतें फर्जी और गलत हों. इसलिए मै तो यही कहूँगी कि महिलाओं को सरकार द्वारा दिया गया यह एक ऐसा हथियार है जो उनके हितों की रक्षा के लिए उन्हें दिया गया है और अगर किसी भी तरह से वे इनका दुरूपयोग करती हैं तो उन्हें भी इसकी सजा मिलनी चाहिए.
लेखिका डा. नूतन ठाकुर स्वतंत्र पत्रकार और सामाजिक कार्यकर्त्री हैं.
मदन कुमार तिवारी
July 6, 2011 at 12:34 pm
नूतन जी दुरुपयोग करने का आरोप वही लगा सकता है जिसने दहेज नही लिया है अगर दहेज लिया है तो झुठा केस भी हो तो कोई बात नही । आखिर दहेज रुकेगा कैसे।
498afighthard
July 18, 2011 at 7:40 pm
http://498afighthard.wordpress.com/2011/06/28/ghaziabad-resident-files-charges-against-spouse-she-in-turn-has-lodged-a-dowry-case-against-him/
Ghaziabad resident files charges against spouse; she in turn has lodged a dowry case against him
They met through a matrimonial site, fell in love and got married. And then things got interesting. Now 30-year-old Vishal Garg says he is a shattered man. The IT company employee met his wife Seema Mittal in 2009. They tied the knot in December, the same year.
Sealed with a kiss: The couple
After a month Vishal came to know that his wife had sexual affairs with a person named Ashish Goel. He insisted that she stop seeing other men. Seema was working with an IT Company in Bangalore.
In happier times: A wedding photo of Ashish and Seema. Pic/Mid Day
“She only stayed with me for 10 days and left for Bangalore citing her job as the reason. When I got to know about her she started putting pressure on me to pay her Rs 50 lakh, threatening to lodge a false dowry case against me and my parents, which she has done now in Bangalore. When I refused to pay she pressurised Ashish, her lover, saying that he would face dire consequences if their illicit relationship was disclosed. Moreover, she started asking him to marry her after I divorced her,” said Vishal.
With time, Ashish’s wife Ruchi also came to know about her husband’s illicit relationship with Seema. Under pressure, Ashish committed suicide in June 2010. Seema also lodged a complaint against Vishal for harassing her.
“Seema’s two brothers-in-law from Gurgaon and Meerut constantly threatened me and my family to divorce her and pay her a hefty amount for which I have already lodged a complaint with Noida police and the SSP but no action has been taken yet. This is just one case. My wife has relations with many men and she just married me to extract money from me. She has a modus operandi under which she posts matrimonial ads in newspapers and internet sites and then traps men for money,” Vishal added.
The Other Side
When MiD DAY contacted Seema Mittal, she said, “I don’t want to comment on the whole matter. All I can say is that I married Vishal in December 2009 and then I had a dispute with my husband because his parents were not treating me well. So I complained about this at a police station in Bangalore. Now both parties will sit together and discuss the issue.”
http://498afighthard.wordpress.com/2011/06/27/days-after-hubby-reunites-lovers-boy-dumps-girl/
Meerut: A few days after a husband accepted his newly-wedded wife as his sister and decided to reunite her with her old lover, the woman has reportedly been dumped by her former lover.
Nitish accepted Aarti, whom he had married on May 6, as his sister after she told him about her affair with Vineet on the night of their marriage.
When Aarti told her new husband that she had already married Vineet a few days back, Nitish decided to reunite the two lovers.
However, Vineet has now apparently been trying to avoid any contact or encounter with Aarti.
Even the efforts of Meerut Police, already struggling to sort out this ‘first of its kind’ case, have failed to deliver any result.
Aarti and Nitish, who were invited by the district administration at the family counselling centre here on Sunday to sort out the issue, turned down the suggestion of experts to live together again, saying that it was not possible as both of them had accepted each other as brother and sister.
When the counsellors tried to contact Vineet, he refused to meet them saying that there was a threat to his life.
Aarti has now decided to go back to her parents house for now.
http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/city/lucknow/Husband-tries-to-reunite-lovers-but-boy-dumps-girl/articleshow/9013970.cms
MEERUT: A few days after a husband accepted his newly-wedded wife as his sister and decided to reunite her with her old lover, the woman has reportedly been dumped by her former lover.
Nitish accepted Aarti, whom he had married on May 6, as his sister after she told him about her affair with Vineet on the night of their marriage.
When Aarti told her new husband that she had already married Vineet a few days back, Nitish decided to reunite the two lovers.
However, Vineet has now apparently been trying to avoid any contact or encounter with Aarti.
Even the efforts of Meerut police, already struggling to sort out this ‘first of its kind’ case, have failed to deliver any result.
Aarti and Nitish, who were invited by the district administration at the family counselling centre here on Sunday to sort out the issue, turned down the suggestion of experts to live together again, saying that it was not possible as both of them had accepted each other as brother and sister.
When the counsellors tried to contact Vineet, he refused to meet them saying that there was a threat to his life.
Aarti has now decided to go back to her parents house for now.
http://www.indiatvnews.com/news/India/Meerut_Husband_Tries_To_Unite_Lovers_But-8745.html
Meerut, June 27: A few days after a husband accepted his newly-wedded wife as his sister and decided to reunite her with her old lover, the woman has reportedly been dumped by her former lover.
Nitish accepted Aarti, whom he had married on May 6, as his sister after she told him about her affair with Vineet on the night of their marriage.
When Aarti told her new husband that she had already married Vineet a few days back, Nitish decided to reunite the two lovers.
However, Vineet has now apparently been trying to avoid any contact or encounter with Aarti. Even the efforts of Meerut Police, already struggling to sort out this ‘first of its kind’ case, have failed to deliver any result.
Aarti and Nitish, who were invited by the district administration at the family counselling centre here on Sunday to sort out the issue, turned down the suggestion of experts to live together again, saying that it was not possible as both of them had accepted each other as brother and sister. When the counsellors tried to contact Vineet, he refused to meet them saying that there was a threat to his life.
Aarti has now decided to go back to her parents house for now. PTI
http://daily.bhaskar.com/article/UP-husband-agrees-to-treat-wife-as-sister-2195911.html
Meerut: Newly-wed woman pleads husband to treat her like sister
Meerut: A woman who married a Meerut businessman confessed before him that she loved another man and pleaded him to treat her like a sister, which he agreed. The newly-wed woman has now sought police protection against threats from her father who is opposed to her love affair, police said on Thursday.
Superintendent of Police (City), Meerut, Prabal Pratap Singh confirmed receiving a request for protection made by the woman identified as Aarti.
“We are looking into a complaint that she received threats from her father,” he said, adding that they would take action, if needed.
Aarti’s father Anil Tyagi is a sub-inspector in Uttarakhand.
Aarti wed Nitish Tyagi, a resident of Devlok Colony in Meerut on May 6, but told him that she had secretly married her lover Vineet earlier.
She said she was forced into the wedding after her elder sister, who was originally supposed to marry Nitish, eloped with her lover.
Nitish’s father, a real estate developer, said his family had accepted Aarti as a daughter. “Her wish to formalise her marriage with Vineet would be fulfilled,” he said.
Aarti told police that her father threatened her and said he would implicate Nitish’s family in a dowry case
http://ibnlive.in.com/news/husband-unites-wife-with-lover-turns-brother/160311-3.html
Husband unites wife with lover, turns brother
Updated Jun 17, 2011 at 09:17pm IST
Meerut: Its a real life story that appears to have been lifted straight out of Bollywood movie with a husband who now wants his wife to be reunited with her estranged lover. If that wasn’t drama enough, the wife went to the extent of tying a ‘rakhi’ on her husband’s wrist that symbolically now makes them brother and sister.
Aarti, who is the daughter of a sub-inspector in Uttrakhand, was allegedly forced to marry her would-be brother-in-law Nitish Tyagi in Meerut on May 6, 2011. This after her sister eloped a few days before their marriage.
Nitish Tyagi said, “I just want her to be happy now. We will get her married to her lover.”
Aarti thinks of her ‘new’ family as her own and call them supportive, while saying that her parents are threatening to kill her.
“This family is very supportive but my parents are threatening to kill me now,” she said.
Nitish’s family has accepted Aarti as their very own and say she is a daughter to them, not a daughter-in-law.
“She is my daughter not daughter-in-law. We want her to be happy,’ said Anil Tyagi, Nitish’s father.
Nitish’s mother said, “Now i have two daughters. We have accepted the situation like it is.”
After she told her husband that she loved someone else, Nitish made it his mission to help her get back with her boyfriend Vineet. His family is also supporting Nitish in this task. They have even gone to the police and met the DIG to help them with the formalities.
However, Aarti’s family is not thrilled with their valiant efforts. Now it remains to be seen when this fairy tale meets its happy end.
http://articles.timesofindia.indiatimes.com/2011-06-17/india/29669740_1_aarti-wedding-marriage-plans
Ajab prem ki ghazab kahani: Meerut youth to marry off wife to lover
Lalit Kumar, TNN Jun 17, 2011, 05.10am IST
MEERUT: In a bizarre tale of marriage without consent, a 21-year-old supervisor in an IT company has got his newly-wedded wife tie a rakhi to him — symbolically making her a sister — after learning that she had earlier secretly married another man. The ‘groom’, Nitesh Tyagi, has also vowed to get the girl, Aarti, married to her lover despite alleged threats from her family. The girl, meanwhile, is living at the supervisor’s house in Meerut’s Devlok Colony.
“Even an animal brought against its will to a new owner will run away. This is a case of a sensitive and educated girl, forced to marry against her wishes. I am proud of my son’s stand and support him wholeheartedly,” said Nitesh’s father Anil Tyagi.
http://www.ndtv.com/article/cities/man-unites-wife-with-lover-accepts-her-as-sister-112769
Man unites wife with lover, accepts her as sister
Press Trust of India, Updated: June 16, 2011 19:58 IST
Meerut: In what seemed to be a scene straight out of a Bollywood movie, a resident of Devlok colony
In Meerut united his newly wedded wife with her lover and accepted her as sister.
Nitish married Aarti on May 6, and just two days later, she told him that she was already married to her lover, Vineet, police said.
In a goodwill gesture, Nitish contacted Vineet on June 8 and asked him to take Aarti with him, DIG (Meerut) Prem Prakash said. “Before going into the legal aspects of the case, the help of a local family counselling centre will be sought into the matter,” the DIG added.
Nitish has said he will accept Aarti as his sister now, police said.
Meanwhile, Nitish’s ‘sacrifice’ has not gone down well with Aarti’s family and her father has threatened legal action against Nitish, Prakash said.
http://www.dailypioneer.com/346568/Rakhi-thread-ties-wedding-vows-in-knots.html
FRONT PAGE | Friday, June 17, 2011 | Email | Print | | Back
Rakhi thread ties wedding vows in knots
June 22, 2011 12:00:00 AM
SP SINGH | MEERUT
When Nitish wed Arti, little did he realise that their holy matrimony would not be for keeps, and there would be a twist in the tale.
The couple accepted each other as brother and sister during their honeymoon trip. This real life story seems to be inspired by the Salman Khan-Ajay Devgn-Aishwarya Rai starrer hit Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam. The real life story, however, is a little more bizarre than the reel life script and may inspire a sequel to the Sanjay Leela Bhansali’s magnum opus.
The ‘wife’ Arti, daughter of Anil Tyagi a Sub-Inspector of Uttarakhand Police was married to Nitish Tyagi a resident of Devlok colony in Meerut and heir to a real estate business on May 6, 2011. On their honeymoon night Arti confessed to her ‘husband’ that she had secretly wed her lover Vineet in a temple, and could not accept him as her husband.
Instead of flying into a jealous rage, Nitish gracefully obliged by accepting Arti’s offer of being her brother instead. The duo returned from the honeymoon trip only to convey their parents that they had returned as bhai-behen and not pati-patni. Nitish’s parents too gave their consent to their proposal and exchanged the mangalsutra with a rakhi.
“Now she is our daughter. Her wishes to formalise her marriage with Vineet will be respected,” said Nitish’s father Anil Tyagi a leading real estate developer in Meerut. Anil recounted how the marriage of his son Nitish was fixed with Neha, the elder daughter of sub inspector Anil Tyagi a resident of Rudrapur in Uttarakhand. But, Neha eloped with her lover a day before the marriage date on May 6, 2011.Fearing social retribution, the father of the girl-Anil Tyagi, a police sub inspector contacted the family of the prospective groom-Nitish and requested them to accept his younger daughter-Aarti Tyagi instead. He pleaded that the invitation cards had been distributed and calling off the wedding at the last moment would greatly embarrass both families.
“On his request we accepted the proposal and solemnized the marriage of Arti with Nitish on the appointed date-May 6, 2011 at Rudrapur,” said Anil. Arti later revealed that she was secretly married to her lover Vineet in a temple about which her family members were unaware. She agreed to the marriage, to avoid bringing dishonour to her family. Nitish didn’t kick up a fuss and accepted her as a sister instead.
When Arti’s father came to know that she had come clean on her secret marriage and that the groom’s family had accepted her as a daughter and even agreed to re-unite the two lovers, he threatened implicate the Tyagis in a false dowry case. “We are facing a great threat from my father so I have requested the Meerut DIG to provide us police cover. This is a gracious family they have accepted me as their daughter and have agreed to re-unite me with the one I love,” Arti told this reporter.
http://www.northindiatimes.com/news/151/ARTICLE/10454/2011-06-16.html
Husband agrees to treat wife as ‘sister’
June 16th, 2011
IANS
Meerut: A woman who married a Meerut businessman confessed before him that she loved another man and pleaded him to treat her like a sister, which he agreed. The newly-wed woman has now sought police protection against threats from her father who is opposed to her love affair, police said Thursday.
Superintendent of Police (City), Meerut, Prabal Pratap Singh confirmed receiving a request for protection made by the woman identified as Aarti.
“We are looking into a complaint that she received threats from her father,” he said, adding that they would take action, if needed.
Aarti’s father Anil Tyagi is a sub-inspector in Uttarakhand.
Aarti wed Nitish Tyagi, a resident of Devlok Colony in Meerut May 6, but told him that she had secretly married her lover Vineet earlier.
She said she was forced into the wedding after her elder sister, who was originally supposed to marry Nitish, eloped with her lover.
Nitish’s father, a real estate developer, said his family had accepted Aarti as a daughter. “Her wish to formalise her marriage with Vineet would be fulfilled,” he said.
Aarti told police that her father threatened her and said he would implicate Nitish’s family in a dowry case.