Goof-ups of CG govt’s prosecution team in ongoing Binayak Sen trial in Raipur sessions court have been covered with deserving ridicule in the national media. This, i think is the most opportune moment to share some hilarious (and not so…) gems from Chhattisgarh Police. Although the context is my Dantewada banishing episode, these observations/statements do help to explain how & why this prosecution is shamed repeatedly in courts.
DSP Mr. Sisodia, Dantewada
-We have seen on tape how you were inciting those minor students. You might have planned on becoming hero by getting arrested while fasting for tribal orphans but we will arrest you for alluring and inciting minor student (without any authority or permission) into joining your agitation.
-You may not have done anything illegal so far but you’re on way to become next Himanshu Kumar.
-Whenever NGOwallahs like you came here we have lost our men. There’s no need for social workers like you here, for at least next two years. Let us do some cleansing and once everything is in control we may invite you back. Till then leave the development of Dantewada on us.
DIG Mr. Singh-CRPF, Dantewada
-All you NGOwallahs are hands-in-glove with naxals. Obviously, because they have an upper hand at the moment but when we get the control you all will come back and support us.
DIG Mr. Kalluri, Dantewada
-I can’t tell you the reality of Himanshu Kumar because of the lady in the room… … when we raided Himanshu’s ashram, we found lots of condoms strewn all over, in a back room.
-You know, these tribals are thankless people. Himanshu worked here for more than 15 years but not even 15 people came to his rescue when he ran in trouble. You should be wary of the place and play smart.
-You said you’ve worked in Pathalgaon. I would suggest you go back, I served in Jashpur as SP, I can arrange some work for you.
-Surely you know about CG Public Security Act, don’t you?
-With what authority did you write to the President of India? How dare you comment about the union home secretary? Do you even know what a Union Home Secretary means? He’s the man who signs appointment letters of governors. Chief Ministers and Governors sit outside his office waiting when the sahib will be free.
-Your marital record isn’t very healthy, if you get entangled with a tribal girl here, there’ll be some serious trouble.
DGP Mr. Vishwaranjan
-No. This is not the right time to bring a cultural troupe to Dantewada. (BK- but sir, the DM-Dantewada has agreed to the proposal.) Collector is not responsible for law and order. April 2010.
-Have you read the Constitution? Have you read the debates in constituent assembly? (BK-…yes, some portions, from several of the 12 volumes) Shut up, there’re not 12 but 18 volumes as brought out by Lok Sabha.
-You’re answering with confidence but I still know you’re a white liar like Shubhranshu.
-I know you can’t write English (because you were born and brought up in CG)…tell me honestly who wrote this letter to the President, in your name?…OK, take a pen and a paper and do an English article right here in the office, I’ll pick out 25 mistakes. (to complete the joke, I went ahead and wrote an article-partially, on the subject given by him- “inputs for future healthcare policy of India”)
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yours sincerely,
B K Manish
Creative Director- PAUSE, Mumbai
(People’s Awareness & Utility Software Enterprise)
Tel: 9920577521
