मैं एनडीटीवी अंग्रेजी का ग्रुप एडिटर बनना चाहता हूं

बीवी राव
बीवी राव
‘गवर्नेंस नाऊ’ के संपादक बीवी राव ने प्रणय राय को एक खुला पत्र लिखकर खुद को ग्रुप एडिटर, इंग्लिश न्यूज, एनडीटीवी का दावेदार बताया है. इस व्यंग्यात्मक पत्र के जरिए बीवी राव ने एनडीटीवी के दोमुंहेपन पर चोट की है. बीवी राव के पत्र को गवर्नेंस नाऊ की वेबसाइट से साभार उठाकर यहां प्रकाशित किया जा रहा है. पत्र अंग्रेजी में है, इसलिए पूरे पत्र को अंग्रेजी में ही दिया जा रहा है.

An open application to Prannoy Roy for post of Group Editor, NDTV

Because I’m innocent, I’m silly, I’m gullible. And I’m available.

Respected Dr Roy,

I am writing to apply for the post of Group Editor, English News, NDTV.

I am a journalist with 26 years experience. Throughout my career I have made innocent mistakes. I have been silly, I have been gullible and I have been prone to making errors of judgement. Frequently, when I am “desperate for khabar” I also fib to sources. I string them along so much that I have often tied myself up in knots.

In short, I’m just the right guy to lead the nation’s most reputed English news channel.

I am aware, Sir, that you already have a silly, innocent and gullible editor prone to making honest errors of judgement. Those credentials were so clearly established on national prime time news the other day. Only an extremely innocent, very silly and highly gullible editor can do it with such aplomb.

Admittedly, Dr Roy, that’s a tough record to beat. But the silly are never daunted by the odds…recall that stuff about fools rushing in where angels fear to tread.

I take heart from two facts: One, that you are perhaps the only editor-in-chief to value such sterling qualities in a group editor, and two, while you might be pretty happy with your in-house options, there are some good alternatives in the market you might want to look at.

It is your faith in and commitment to the cause of the ISGs (innocent, silly and gullible), Dr Roy, that has emboldened me to give the job a shot. I want to convince you that when it comes to these sterling qualities, I dig a lonely furrow…it’s actually a deep trench because I have been at it for 26 years.

Sir, I suspect you will be extremely upset at the completely unconventional way in which this application is being framed. So, let me quickly give you three examples of the work I have done so far.  Please judge me only by my work, not what I say about it on tape.

1. When I was just a few months into the profession,  Akali Dal leader Sant Longowal was assassinated. His assassination followed Indira Gandhi’s who was killed just a few months earlier. I had just subbed the copy when my chief sub asked me “what’s the headline?”  “Longowal calls on Indira Gandhi,” I read out loud and proud.

The chief sub leaped out of her chair in horror and grabbed the copy. She called me silly and stupid. She even proclaimed me “dangerous” and banished me from the news desk.

You see, Dr Roy, I was editor material even then. Just that I was in wrong hands. Where were you, Dr Roy? I can’t help wondering “why just Barkha, why is she so lucky”?

2. Once when I was editor of a small Delhi afternoon paper, we ran an expose on upcoming illegal structures in Connaught Place. We illustrated the story with a big picture of a multi-storey building shot stealthily. Next morning it turned out the building belonged to the newspaper’s proprietor.

Error of judgement is passé, Dr Roy, I have monumental blunders on my hand.

3. More recently, I was in the middle of writing Counterfeit, my most most-read weekly column on notional affairs. Two big corporate houses were warring over some goddamn national asset and I wanted to get to the bottom of things. Who better to get an insight from than the PR persons on both sides?  The first guy took me out to lunch and explained his client’s position. I was fully convinced he was right till the other PR took me out to lunch and explained her client’s position. I was convinced she was right too.

But I was two full, two convinced and too confused. So, I wrote about the food instead.

But then word got out. As you well know, our strict code of ethics lays down that a journalist can have only one free meal per topic. Fellow journalists were livid. But since nobody could prove quid pro quo, they pilloried me in public for being unethical and accused me in private of selling the profession cheap. I am however convinced most of them were just jealous of the extra meal I managed…but that’s beside the point, the pillorying continued because they said “joh pakda gaya wahi chor”.

I had to take matters into my hand because the cat seemed to have gotten my channel’s tongue. I agreed to be grilled by my peers in full public glare. Four white haired gents turned up. For the first time the channel made a departure from the policy of not putting out any raw material on air and played the full unedited tape.

On air I made a clean breast of things.  “I may have been greedy, I may have been hungry, but nobody dare accuse me of corruption,” I said, clearly setting the contours of the debate. “But of course, it’s been a learning experience. Looking back now with all that one now knows about dirty lobbyists,  I have no hesitation in saying that it’s perhaps best to carry one’s own lunch box to work. I have since bought a Milton electric lunch box.”

“No journalist is lily white,” the oldest and gentlest of them all began, “I don’t know of many journalists who carry their tiffin to office….” but I cut him short.  ”Nobody is lily white but all that you will discuss is one spot on my kurta? Why only me,” I thundered. I wanted to punch all of them in their holier-than-thou faces but for form’s sake I just bit my dry lips and somehow held my temper and my hand.

Many close friends upbraided me for appearing on the show. They told me I looked angry, sounded pompous and arrogant. They advised me not to mention the incident in this application because it would look rather silly trying to get an important job on the evidence of this show.

But that is the point I’m trying to make, Dr Roy. I am silly. And I did not stumble on silliness, innocence and gullibility “inadvertently” after 16 years of blemish-less journalism.   I worked at it for 26 long years.

In other qualifications, I must point out that I am a damn good political reporter, even if I say so myself. In the thick of things such as the UPA’s cabinet formation, all kinds of people call me to carry messages to the Congress party. Sometimes there are problems of non-delivery such as that message I did not give Ghulam Nabi Azad but I believe, because I’m a good journalist, even if this were about the NDA forming its cabinet, I would still be a busy courier boy.

I would have loved to attach copies of my work as a political reporter but sadly, Dr Roy, I have none. That is because I have never reported politics.

I know, I know…that is not consistent with my claim to being a good political journalist. I was just stringing you along, Dr Roy.

When can I join?

Yours sincerely,

B V Rao

Comments on “मैं एनडीटीवी अंग्रेजी का ग्रुप एडिटर बनना चाहता हूं

  • Shesh Narain Singh says:

    In karanon se aap ko kaam naheen milega. aap pahle apne pita ji ke baare mein bataaiye . unkee haisiyat se naape jaaygen . naheen to chhotee motee nauakree milegee vahaan.

    Reply
  • Dr. Pranav Roy ji ki Aatma mar chuki hai . Wakayee wo *Sachche* Economist hain, jo paise ke aage kuch nahi dekhta. Jo paisa kamaata bhi hai to Economics ki jatiltaaon ka fhaayada uthaakar. Sharm hoti to ab tak Barkha ko hata chuke hote ! Par suna hai ki **Bade logon ko sharm badi der se aati hai**. Par yahaan to der kab ka ho chuki hai ! Ho sakta hai ki Dr Roy Sahab is baat par yakin rakhte hon , ki —- JISNE KI SHARM-USKE FHUTE KARM.
    Ye hai PADHE-LIKHE high society mein rahne waalon ka haal.
    NDTV ka haal dekh kar MULAAYAM SINGH JI AUR AMAR SINGH JI ki yaad aa jaati hai. Kyunki Amar Singh JI , aksar Mulaayam Singh ji ki pol khol dene ki dhamki dete rahte hain . Kahin Barkha Dutt ne bhi , NDTV ka koi raaz to nahi chipa rakha hai .
    CBI WAALE DHYAAN DE.

    Reply
  • gunjan sinha says:

    Hats off to you, Mr Rao.You have made an excellent commentary on the state of not only NDTV but almost the entire Indian media today.

    Reply
  • Pradeep Kumar Raghav says:

    Highly praiseworthy satire on some of the senior journalist working in reputed media houses and making silly mistakes now and then. I’m not sure whether this satirical letter of Mr. Rao makes him able to wield the highest designation in NDTV 24×7 but it will certainly be famous among the readers of Bhadas4Media’s reader…Have a good day Mr. Rao, I became ur fan…Sir ji…
    Regards
    Pradeep Raghav
    News producer

    Reply
  • Amarnath Tewary says:

    Not only you rightly deserve the post at ND tv but also a fat, plump yet pretty good package that must comes in regularly at the end of the month…And, here goes a suggestion[ya, of course, free of cost] try to inculcate some dramatic, bold and theatrical part in your profession…it uplifts TRP sometime…

    Hope, We the People, of India see you soon on the tube…

    Amarnath Tewary, Patna

    Reply
  • AS Raghunath says:

    Good one Mr. Rao. Enjoyed reading it. Hope to read your such takes on many others out there. Keep them coming. I remember your writings when you were in Indian Express, Ahmedabad.

    Raghunath

    Reply
  • तरुण ठाकुर says:

    अच्छा तरीका है। आपका ये निवेदन उन्हें जरुर पसंद आयेगा। अगर पसंद ना आये तो समझ में जरुर आ जायेगा।

    Reply
  • Sameer Qureshi says:

    Rao Sahara, only u deserve this post there is no comprason of yours, that i saw in Star News. i thing u were giving a gud Chance to NDTV.
    All the Best.
    Regards
    Sameer Qureshi
    Agra

    Reply
  • Srijan Shilpi says:

    सटीक, चुटीला कटाक्ष !

    मगर उनकी खाल शायद इतनी मोटी है कि उनपर कोई असर न हो।

    Reply
  • aditya kumar says:

    could not have been better, response is anticipated but would never come, I gaurantee. People are so scared about the fair journalism that the concerned people might not respond et all. but that does not mean, it is not read………….message is delivered mate, very well.

    Reply
  • Sahee kaha sheshji ne. Shaayad wo din bhool gaye jab swayam NDTV mein kaam karte the. Raat din chamchaagiri karte phirte the. Roys kaa bakhaan karte naheen thakte the. Jab daal naheen galee to angoor khatte lagne lage…kyun?

    Reply
  • Raj Lakhwani says:

    Sir, Mai aapko jyada to nahi janta par aapke likhne ke andaje baya se lagta hai ke wakai aapko is field me 26 sal ho gaye he par, jab aap in namurado se job ki ummeed karte hai to lagta hai aap ab tak sach se mukhatib nahi hue he……Warna itna sach bolne ke bad to ghar wale ghar se nikal dete hai aajkal to fir ye aapko kyo rakhenge

    Reply
  • Neh Arjun Indwar says:

    Dear Rao,

    You must remember that the NDTV group editor is so innocent, makes silly simple mistake. She is so simple so there is no blush in her face and she continuing as group editor and speaking on behalf on ,’Janata Raja’ Niir-ideas as usual. Dr. Dr. Pranoy Roy is no innocent and likes her ‘job’ of news gathering and presenting ideas to ‘right’ place so your chance is dimm.

    Reply

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *